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Skip Navigation Links>Jokes>Labels

Labels (8/2/01)

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner!  No purchase necessary.  Details inside.

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap

Some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost

On a hotel-provided shower cap in a box:
Fits one head

On Tesco's Tiramisu desert:
Do not turn upside down. (Printed on the bottom of the box.)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating

On packaging for a Rowenta Iron:
Do not iron clothes on body

On Nytol (a sleep aid):
Warning: may cause drowsiness

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning, keep out of children

On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.

On Sainsbury's Peanuts
Warning: contains nuts

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands

(C) 2007 Kevin Grimshaw